April 24, 2008

Thinking About Death

I think about death a bit too much. More than what would probably be considered healthy. I am very sentimental about life and everything that defines it—people, places, memories— and so when someone dies, its hard for me to take in that all those experiences and what define that person, are gone as well. Why am I writing this now? Well, my company is working with a local mortuary doing some TV spots for them. It basically consists of interviews with a family member talking about someone that they lost. Well, I have been given the task of scanning in lots and lots of pictures of the relatives that have passed away. I find myself starring at those photos. Thinking that this person is gone. This person was once a young child, far from thoughts of death. This person experienced different things in this world and accumulated many fond memories that they cherished in their hearts. But now they are gone. This, person, which I am scanning, was a world or even a universe of his own, but no more.

I tell you, discussions of biblical criticism and how to raise my children pale in consideration to the emptiness I feel not knowing what happens afterwards. And add to that feeling that it can come at any given second. We walk through Deaths shadow all day long and it’s at his discretion that we keep walking. But sooner or later, his finger points at you, and you are gone. And yes, the usual response is to lead a meaningful life and to make the best with the time we’ve got, but still, how depressing.